Reboot RSS Straight Up Your Ass

This rant is a bit short as I’m currently off in my company’s Dublin office. Sadly, even drinking with my Mick cousins must take back seat to beating on New Media Douchebags.

If there is one thing that New Media Douchebags love to do more than everything else it’s rebooting shit. Why should government and industry leaders pay attention to actual experts when they have the never ending cesspool of wisdom from the likes of Anil Dash, Robert Scoble and Dave Winer to pull from? And if you’re Dave “get off my lawn, and by lawn I mean RSS” Winer, then you absolutely want to “reboot” RSS. Thus we have a post from last Monday on Scripting News titled How to reboot RSS.

The Dave Winer Crazy Train starts off immediately with the first paragraph:

I was not able to influence the VCs who started the RSS companies — famous companies like Newsgator and Feedburner, and not-so-famous ones. Like most VCs they thought they understood better, so they went their own way and most of their companies flopped.

OH THOSE FOOLS! Ignore the sagacity of the mighty Dave Winer and your company will fail! Or, it could be that, barring advertisement, it’s fucking hard to monetize Internet services in an environment where every overly-entitled twat expects that everything delivered over a TCP/IP connection must be magically free. Dave continues:

The people in the tech press never listened either — at the beginning it was CNET, and these days its TechCrunch. I keep saying the same thing over and over, the Google Reader approach is wrong, it isn’t giving you what’s new — and that’s all that matters in news.

You heard it from Dave mother-fuckers. If it ain’t delivered instantly, it ain’t “news.” Of course Dave typically ignores that what most people define as “news” would better be called “journalism” or at worst “infotainment.” Sure, we expect “the News” to be delivered in a timely manner, and we’ll gravitate towards services that prioritize speed over accuracy; but nonetheless, merely being “new” is insufficient.

So what does Ol’ Man Dave suggest will be the replacement for the “doomed” Google Reader model. Twitter, of course. You see, to New Media Douchebags like Dave the ideal model of information dissemination is one where everything is filtered though “influencers” aka New Media Douchebags.

Whatever Dave, the world passed you by. Fucking deal with it.