The Angry Drunk

I took a break from drowning my corporate sorrows in booze to take a look at the latest Microsoft advertisements; and I have to say, I’m fucking impressed.

Impressed that a single corporation can so utterly and completely not fucking get it.

The ad (I’m too lazy to dig up a link, Google it) consists of a slew of famous and average people proudly proclaiming “I’m a PC.” Given that the ad kicks off with a half-assed John Hodgman look-alike; it’s obvious that Microsoft is taking a swipe at Apple’s “I’m a Mac and I’m a PC” ads. This is the precise spot where you can scientifically prove that Microsoft has no fucking clue. Here’s a hint Bill, Justin “I’m a Mac” Long isn’t supposed to represent Mac users.  And similarly, “PC” isn’t supposed to represent Microsoft users. I know that this sort of subtle metaphor is a bit high-brow for the nerdlingers at Microsoft; but I’ll try to explain this simply. Within the world of the Apple ads, Hodgman and Long are literally PC and Mac.

This is what the various idiots on the intarwebs who decry the Apple ads as being “smug” don’t get either. PC isn’t represented by a slightly befuddled yet likable guy in a suit because the cats at Apple think that PC users are like that; but because that image best represents the PC itself. Of course, Microsoft can’t understand that, so we’re subjected to yet another lame “people use PC’s, honestly” advertisements.

But hey, it could be worse, it could be Bill Gates and Jerry Seinfeld comparing dick sizes or soemthing.

September 19th, 2008 | Tags: advertising, Microsoft | Category: Posts |  Print This Post | Comments (16)

Greetings from Eire’s drizzly shores.

Unfortunately, this isn’t going to win me any friends; and may well alienate some of my readers; but fuck it, it needs saying. The big news in the Apple/iPhone media last week and this week is the story of how Apple denied App Store Access to a program citing as the reason that the application in question duplicated functionality built into iTunes. This, of course has been met with the usual hyperbolic reactions ranging from approval to threats of mass developer suicide.

Now, get one thing absolutely fucking clear here. I’m not defending Apple’s stance here. If this is, in fact, going to be Apple’s policy going forward then the parties responsible should be hunted down and converted into Solylent Green until they relent. It’s stupid and short-sighted. That is, if this is an actual Apple policy.

See the thing is, so far, while I have read an ungodly number of blog posts and news stories about this, I have yet to read anything approaching the following:

An Apple spokesperson confirmed the policy.

Or maybe this:

When approached for comment, Apple denied the rumors and stated that a more defined policy would be forthcoming.

Or even this:

Apple declined to comment on the story.

The bottom line is, I have yet to see any indication that any of the so-called “journalists” covering this story have even made an attempt to speak with anyone at Apple about it. I mean, for fuck’s sake, you can argue all day long that Apple needs to be better about communicating, and I’ll agree with you completely. But that does not absolve “journalists” from performing the basic functions of their jobs. You cannot simply sit around and wait for Apple PR to do your job for you. Sadly, this level of “journalism” seems to be par for the course in the tech media these days.

No wonder Apple seems to hold you guys with such disdain.

Bonus: My Completely Speculative Take On The App Store Shenanigans.

Since this is my personal blog; and since I make no attempts to claim the title of “journalist.” Let me give my take on what is going on with the App Store approval process.

When I look at the applications that make it into the App Store; as well as the one’s that don’t; I don’t see a pattern of corporate dominance. Fuck, I don’t see a pattern at all. What I do see is a badly mangled process; that is probably being “managed” by the front line approval team. I have this vision of a cube farm full of Customer Service monkeys (not necessarily in the U.S.A.) making all of this shit up as they go along.

Is that a problem. Yes. Is it the problem the blogokleinbottle thinks it is? Not really.

Now, I’m off to eat some horrid Irish “cuisine.”

September 16th, 2008 | Tags: Apple, blogorama, iPhone, new media douchebags, old media douchebags | Category: Posts |  Print This Post | Comments (9)

Like the rest of the nerdosphere I’ve been giving Google’s new browser Chrome a try. For the record, I’m running Chrome on my Windows XP laptop at work; I’m not about to run a VM session just to test it out on the iMac at home. My initial reaction? I think Chrome presents some interesting ideas, but it’s probably not going to be my default XP browser, and almost certainly won’t be my default browser in OS X. Details after the fold.

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September 3rd, 2008 | Tags: Google | Category: Posts |  Print This Post | Comments (8)