By The Angry Drunk
 Like I wrote yesterday, I’m not particularly interested in doing any sort of roundup of the announcements from Apple’s yearly Music Event held yesterday, September 1st. However, there are a few things that popped out at me that I’d like to explore. Initially I was going to do some claim chowdah analysis and break down exactly how wrong Engadget was about the supposed iTV, but there really isn’t anything new to be said there. Anyway, Joel Topolsky is already spinning the announcements to say that Apple is so totally going to make those changes, but things changed at the last minute. Whatever douche, keep spinning. What is interesting to me, and touches on the idiocy around the AppleTV, is the way that iOS was almost fetishized by the tech press during the announcement.
Continue reading The iOS Fetish
By The Angry Drunk
Last week I tallied up my predictions on the predictions being made for the annual Apple September Music event by the rumorsphere. Now that the event is come and gone it’s time to grade my performance, and the performance of the rumormongers in general. Before I begin though, I think I need to clarify what I’m up to with these rumor predictions posts. First of all, the items that I list are not my predictions. They are the predictions being bandied about by the punditsphere. Secondly, the percentage values that I assign are completely pulled from my ass, often for comedic effect. That said, let’s see how we did.
Continue reading Apple Special Event Predictions – The Results
By The Angry Drunk
 Sometimes the New Media Douchebag circus is too good for the freak-show and needs to be in the main ring. Case in point, today’s twaddle from Dave “Cranky-Pants” Winer, Dear Apple, re your boycott of Flash. Ooh, goody, goody gumdrops. It’s criticism in epistle form; my favorite thing.
Continue reading Dave You Ignorant Slut
By The Angry Drunk
For those who are unaware, Apple is holding a special event on September 1st, just like they do every September. Not being one to be left out of the fun, here’s my take on the chances of various rumors coming to pass.
Continue reading Apple Special Event Predictions
By The Angry Drunk
Cross posted from Dave Winer’s Crazy Train…
So, let’s get this straight. Uncle Dave doesn’t like the rough-and-tumble nature of blog commentary (a reasonable position to take, I hate you pricks too), but he’s too narcissistic do without the fawning admiration of strangers. What’s a New Media Douchebag to do? Well, if you’re Dave Winer, you come up with…this. Please, for the love of fuck, someone implement this so I can properly laugh at it.
Continue reading Crazy Uncle Dave (Re)Invents Comments
By The Angry Drunk
 So, yeah, Google put the kibosh on Wave this week and now we must endure the inevitable tsunami (Ha! A “wave” joke) of post-mortems from the tech press. See, there’s an unwritten rule in the punditsphere that says that the volume of babble produced when a product fails is directly proportional to the amount of hype from the tech press when the product was announced.
Continue reading Obligatory Google Wave Post
By The Angry Drunk
Taking a page from the playbook of John “mother of all tools” Dowdell, Dave Winer has declared that he will no longer tolerate off-topic discussion and mindless Apple fanboyism on his precious blog. Of course, in Dave’s world “off-topic” means “doesn’t agree with my sage wisdom” and “mindless Apple fanboyism” means “in any way approving of Apple.”
Look Dave, we get it, people disagreeing with you irritates you. I mean, good gods people, don’t you know who this is? This is Dave Winer. The “proto-blogger!” Having your narcissistic and ill-thought-out bullshit pointed out to you must be agonizing. I’d suggest dispensing with comments entirely, but then how would you get your fix of sycophantic cock-sucking? A man can’t live by his achievements alone for fuck’s sake!
By The Angry Drunk
 If you haven’t heard the news, Apple has delayed the white iPhone yet again; this time to “later this year” which, as we all know is Apple-talk for December 31′st.
All joking aside, if the media is looking for a story to play up the “Apple is run by incompetent designtards” there you go. Announcing a product and not being able to ship it for upwards of six months is pathetic. Where’s my press conference mother-fuckers?
I’m going to buy a Droid X out of spite.
By The Angry Drunk
I wasn’t present at Friday’s special iPhone 4 Press Conference held by Apple at their Cupertino Campus, but I followed the excellent live coverage from Jason Snell at Macworld. Ignoring the specifics of the announcements (spoiler: there is no fucking recall you fucktards), one thing jumped out at me: Steve Jobs was palpably angry with the media.
Continue reading Why Steve Jobs Is (Legitimately) Pissed at the Media
By The Angry Drunk
Looking to get into the fun (and apparently lucrative) game of shopping around emails from Steve Jobs, I went ahead and sent him a note. Imagine my utter shock and amazement when he answered. Here is a copy of our exchange:
Continue reading Emails From Steve
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Brother, can you spare a dime?
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