September 30th, 2008, by The Angry Drunk Today’s dose of “teh stoopid” comes to us courtesy of The Apple Blog in this wonderful gem of idiocy from Bob Rudis titled iTunes Store and Apple’s DRM Safe Haven In Jeopardy. I have neither the time, nor the energy to properly disect this gem; but it breaks down like this. Apple recently commented that the rate hikes on digital downloads being proposed by the Copyright Royalty Board could make it shut down the iTunes Store. For those with terminal brain dysfunction, this is what we call a “bluff.” Bob combines this fact with the fact that Walmart, that paragon of consumer activism recently shut down its wildly successful online music store; and in the process of doing so told it’s customers to pound sand. From these two events, related tangentially at best, Bob then extrapolates a dystopian future where Apple shutters iTunes and leaves its customers in the lurch. Of course, this leads us to Bob’s heroic cry to the common man to rise up against the shackles of FairPlay and ask, nay, demand that Apple violate their contracts with the music industry and remove FairPlay now. It’s really too bad that Apple, in its usual secretive
Continue reading What Fresh Idiocy Is This?
September 30th, 2008, by The Angry Drunk Tucked amid the financial doom and gloom this week was this annoying tidbit. Apparently some twat in Norway has decided to run his mouth some more about how Apple is required to make iTunes Store purchases interoperable with their competitors’ products…or else. I’m sorry, but this sort of shit enrages me. I am a advocate of consumer rights; but, once upon a time, “consumer rights” meant things like “your car doesn’t explode,” and “your food isn’t poison.” Not the current refrain of “wah, gimme what I want” that seems to be synonymous with the phrase now. Here’s the facts for the simpletons out there who don’t get it. You have no right to demand that every thing that a corporation sells you be provided in any format that strikes your fancy. If you don’t like iPods, then buy your music from any of the dozens of alternate sources and play it on whatever the fuck you like. And, in particular to Bjoern Erik Thon, fuck you in your frost-bitten, entitletard ear.
September 24th, 2008, by The Angry Drunk Last night I posted a quick blurb that said: I just want to go on record here that I will go back to using tin cans and fucking string before I use a phone with an OS developed by Google. So mote it be. In the comments for that post Wes asked: What’s your reason for this? Don’t like Google or some other objection? I’d use it if its Mac support was as good as the iPhones and the user experience was as good or better. I don’t really have much else to write about; so I figure I’ll go ahead and answer this on. The bottom line is, no I do not like Google. Why don’t I like Google? Well, the answer to that question is long and complicated; so I’m going to limit my answer to Google in relation to the Android OS. What Google Is: To start out I’d like to take a brief moment to summarize exactly what Google is; since many in the tech industry don’t seem to know. Google is a publicly traded corporation; just like Apple, or everyone’s least favorite tech. company: Microsoft. This means that Google exists solely
Continue reading Don’t Drink the Google-Ade
September 23rd, 2008, by The Angry Drunk 
I just want to go on record here that I will go back to using tin cans and fucking string before I use a phone with an OS developed by Google. So mote it be.
September 23rd, 2008, by The Angry Drunk
Apparently some sort of “iPhone killer” was launched today; but for the life of me I can’t work up the motivation to read about it. Someone page me when I’m supposed to care.
September 19th, 2008, by The Angry Drunk I took a break from drowning my corporate sorrows in booze to take a look at the latest Microsoft advertisements; and I have to say, I’m fucking impressed. Impressed that a single corporation can so utterly and completely not fucking get it. The ad (I’m too lazy to dig up a link, Google it) consists of a slew of famous and average people proudly proclaiming “I’m a PC.” Given that the ad kicks off with a half-assed John Hodgman look-alike; it’s obvious that Microsoft is taking a swipe at Apple’s “I’m a Mac and I’m a PC” ads. This is the precise spot where you can scientifically prove that Microsoft has no fucking clue. Here’s a hint Bill, Justin “I’m a Mac” Long isn’t supposed to represent Mac users. And similarly, “PC” isn’t supposed to represent Microsoft users. I know that this sort of subtle metaphor is a bit high-brow for the nerdlingers at Microsoft; but I’ll try to explain this simply. Within the world of the Apple ads, Hodgman and Long are literally PC and Mac. This is what the various idiots on the intarwebs who decry the Apple ads as being “smug” don’t get either. PC isn’t
Continue reading I’m Microsoft; And I Don’t Have a Clue
September 16th, 2008, by The Angry Drunk Greetings from Éire’s drizzly shores. Unfortunately, this isn’t going to win me any friends; and may well alienate some of my readers; but fuck it, it needs saying. The big news in the Apple/iPhone media last week and this week is the story of how Apple denied App Store Access to a program citing as the reason that the application in question duplicated functionality built into iTunes. This, of course has been met with the usual hyperbolic reactions ranging from approval to threats of mass developer suicide. Now, get one thing absolutely fucking clear here. I’m not defending Apple’s stance here. If this is, in fact, going to be Apple’s policy going forward then the parties responsible should be hunted down and converted into Solylent Green until they relent. It’s stupid and short-sighted. That is, if this is an actual Apple policy. See the thing is, so far, while I have read an ungodly number of blog posts and news stories about this, I have yet to read anything approaching the following: An Apple spokesperson confirmed the policy. Or maybe this: When approached for comment, Apple denied the rumors and stated that a more defined policy would be forthcoming. Or
Continue reading The Sorry State Of “Journalism”
September 16th, 2008, by The Angry Drunk
No, I haven’t died yet. I’m in Ireland for the next week; so updates will be spotty…er, spottier.
September 10th, 2008, by The Angry Drunk
Well, apparently the Large Hadron Collider didn’t destroy the Universe. Unfortunately this means I’m going to have to pay for all the hookers and blow from last weekend. Damn.
September 8th, 2008, by The Angry Drunk
I finally saw Microsoft’s new advertisement with Bill Gates and Jerry Seinfeld this morning. I’m not sure what it had to do with computing; but I really want a new pair of shoes now. Oh, and a churro.
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