Zero Tolerance (FOAGOMP)

August 30th, 2008, by The Angry Drunk

I’m declar­ing a zero tol­er­ance pol­icy towards the will­fully igno­rant, the ter­mi­nally self absorbed, and the crim­i­nally self­ish. To take a page from the author David Brin, I am part of a civ­i­liza­tion, and so are you. What does that mean? It means that respond­ing to the issues of the day with facile responses such as “the government’s always been cor­rupt,” or “why bother the elec­tion is fixed,” or sim­i­lar tripe is no longer accept­able. Slightly more accept­able is com­men­tary that ade­quately exposes the com­menter as being an dick, who’s only out for their own inter­ests. Such peo­ple are evil; but mock­ing them amuses me. In short, if you aren’t ready to join the rest of the human race, Fuck Off And Get Off My Planet.

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My Dream

August 29th, 2008, by The Angry Drunk
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This is my dream for Obama’s first press con­fer­ence after the inauguration:

Obama walks to the podium. Suddenly old-school hip hop starts play­ing and Obama yells, “Yo! Yo! Yo my negroes! Where all the white women at up in the hizz-ouse?”

Once the screams of hor­ror and panic die down the music will stop, and Obama will calmly say, “Yeah, that’s what I thought. Screw you hon­key motherfuckers.”

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Concern

August 29th, 2008, by The Angry Drunk
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Apparently the new right wing tac­tic is to express their con­cern that we pro­gres­sives don’t get our hopes up too high over Obama. Thanks douchebags, I think we’ll manage.

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Porn:

August 28th, 2008, by The Angry Drunk
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If I ever go into porn, my stage name will be “Deuce McCockle.”

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Thank You Hillary.

August 27th, 2008, by The Angry Drunk

Before get­ting started here I want to make a few things clear. I do not like the Clintons; nei­ther Hillary or Bubba. I’m firmly of the opin­ion that they, and the Democratic Leadership Council that they rep­re­sent are, in many ways, noth­ing more than “Republican Lite.” Having said that, if the sit­u­a­tion was dif­fer­ent and Hillary had cinched the nom­i­na­tion, not only would I be vot­ing for her in November; I would be enthu­si­as­ti­cally cam­paign­ing for her the whole way. Not because I like her or dis­like McCain, not because of any “loy­alty” to the Democratic party, but out of loy­alty to the United States of America. Because I don’t think that the lower and mid­dle classes of this coun­try can sur­vive even another four years of the crim­i­nally inept “lead­er­ship” that the real Republicans bring to the table.

Now, given that, I have to say “thank you” to Hillary for the speach she gave last night at the Democratic National Convention (text here). It couldn’t have been easy for Senator Clinton to swal­low her pride and deliver the rous­ing endorse­ment of Barack Obama that she did. And have no doubt, it was

Continue read­ing Thank You Hillary.


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Brilliant Logic

August 20th, 2008, by The Angry Drunk

I’m going to take a quick break from Apple and New Media Douchebag related top­ics to point out some Old Media Douchebaggery. I don’t fol­low sports much (read, “at all”) but I can spot some dip­shit logic as well and any­one, so this piece by Alan Abrahamson at nbcolympics​.com caught my eye. The bot­tom line is that some Jamaican cat named Usain Bolt broke some world records. Apparently this dude is really fast. The part that I want to high­light is this. After ques­tion­ing whether Mr. Bolt is under the influ­ence of any­thing more pow­er­ful than some tasty jerk chicken, Abrahamson writes:

And while no evi­dence of any sort has sur­faced to sug­gest he’s not, it’s naïve not to won­der how Bolt is able to run so fast. Because no one in the his­tory of human beings, from the first prim­i­tive soul des­per­ately try­ing to out­run a saber-toothed tiger to the sophis­ti­cated races of our times, has ever run as fast as Usain Bolt has run at the 2008 Beijing Olympic Games.

Fuck me run­ning! Isn’t that the point of break­ing a record? Apparently, in Alan’s mind, doing any­thing more com­pe­tently than a nean­derthal is

Continue read­ing Brilliant Logic


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More Reflections On ‘Social Networking’ and a Shameless Plug

August 19th, 2008, by The Angry Drunk

A cou­ple of posts back I went on one of my semi-annual rants about “social net­work­ing” and the fact that the New Media Douchebag con­tin­gent that most pro­motes “social” tech­nol­ogy is the group that least gets it. The group of friends that I men­tioned in that pre­vi­ous post is a great exam­ple of peo­ple using “social net­work­ing” (in their case MySpace) to enhance, rather than replace actual rela­tion­ships. For us, MySpace is basi­cally noth­ing more than a com­mu­nity mes­sage board, where we can post point­less lit­tle mes­sages or coor­di­nate a happy hour. The real rela­tion­ships are based in the real world.

There is another group of friends that I have that are uti­liz­ing “social net­work­ing” (again in the form of MySpace). This group is orthog­o­nal to the first group I men­tioned, but they illus­trate the other way that ser­vices like MySpace and Facebook can actu­ally act to bring peo­ple closer rather than act as a way for mar­keters to gather vast audi­ences. This group is com­prised of peo­ple whom I have know, who I still con­sider friends, but who have drifted out of my life for one rea­son or another. MySpace is giv­ing us a fairly sim­ple way

Continue read­ing More Reflections On ‘Social Networking’ and a Shameless Plug


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Suck It Blogosphere!

August 19th, 2008, by The Angry Drunk

MacRumors is report­ing that some bunch named the American Customer Satisfaction Index have ranked Apple at the top of some cus­tomer sat­is­fac­tion sur­vey. But wait, I thought that Apple was doomed by it’s hor­ri­ble hubris to a fate worse than cor­po­rate death. Oh, that’s just what the doucheblogs want us to think. In real­ity, the aver­age con­sumer prob­a­bly hasn’t even heard of the major­ity of the issues that we’ve all been nat­ter­ing about for the last few months.

Let me tell you a story…

Once upon a time, when I was at EarthLink, I was part of the team that was in charge of data gath­er­ing and report­ing for cus­tomer sat­is­fac­tion sur­vey data. This means that, among the var­i­ous unpleas­ant things I was respon­si­ble for, I had not only access to the com­piled sur­vey return data but access to the raw stream of sur­vey returns. Of par­tic­u­lar note was the sur­vey com­ments. Based on the com­ments that we were get­ting back, it was obvi­ous that EarthLink was pos­si­bly the worst com­pany on the face of the planet, and we should all kill our­selves out of embar­rass­ment (a the­sis that I’m not exactly disputing).

Now, here’s where it gets

Continue read­ing Suck It Blogosphere!


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Douchebag of the Week (Early Contender)

August 18th, 2008, by The Angry Drunk

Hey kids, got this one via the whiny fuck­ers over at The Consumerist under the delight­fully wrong title of AT&T Won’t Honor iPhone Price Announced In Its Own Press Release. The long and short of it is that our Douchebag of the Week con­tender “Rom” wants an iPhone 3G, and he doesn’t want to pay the unsub­sidised price, even though he recently bought a BlackBerry from AT&T too. Hey, chuck­le­fuck, wake up! This is how the sub­si­dized phone trade works. The sooner you dips real­ize this, the sooner I can stop main­lin­ing Pepto Bismol. I guess I can’t be too hard on Rom though, he is a Ferengi, and we all know what cheap fuck­ers they are.

(Via Consumerist.)

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My God Another One Gets It!

August 13th, 2008, by The Angry Drunk

In a wel­come break from the cur­rent tor­rent of “Apple is dooomed” report­ing, Jason Snell over at MacWorld hits on, what I think, is the real story in this piece. Jason’s argu­ment, which I agree with whole-heartedly, is that the string of Apple fail­ures lead­ing up to July’s mega fiasco is the result of Apple sim­ply bit­ing off more than it can chew. I think that this is self-evident, and if you look care­fully I think that you can see the seeds of this sit­u­a­tion going all the way back to the release of Tiger and the PPC to Intel tran­si­tion. Additionally, I think that the signs are there for those who want to see them that Apple gets this, and is work­ing to pull them­selves out of the hole. As one tiny piece of evi­dence I’ll point to the “no major fea­tures” Snow Leopard release. The bot­tom line is, Apple isn’t “arro­gant,” or “incom­pe­tent.” They’re sim­ply fac­ing the con­se­quences of being too successful.

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