Breaking: 3G iPhone Based on Alien Technology

I don’t really have any any­thing else to write about; but I was tired of watch­ing the down­ward slope on my page hits graph, so here goes. I received a report from a source close to Apple today with incon­tro­vert­ible proof that the soon-to-be released 3G iPhone will incor­po­rate tech­nol­ogy recov­ered from the alien scout­ship that crashed in Roswell, New Mexico in 1947. This tech­nol­ogy will not only allow the iPhone to down­load web­sites faster than the cur­rent “human based” 2G iPhone; but it will also be the first com­mer­cial device to add sup­port for the Point to Point Taser Protocol (PPTP). You heard it here first folks,