Everything seems to work. Yippie!
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 Inspired by bynkii.com who comes in at a paltry 16%. If there is anything that I excel at it’s profanity, motherfuckers. There was a post on The Apple Blog today that got me thinking. While I disagree with the conclusions that the author draws, I don’t think that this is a case of the usual blogoratti magical thinking. Rather, I think that there is some fundamental missunderstanding of the current market in video entertainment. The author puts forth the premise that iTunes, as well as streaming video services such as Netflix-streaming, and Amazon Unbox have a “glaring gap” compared with DVD/Blue-Ray when it comes to “additional content,” where by additional content we’re refering to things such as alternate endings, deleted scenes, etc. My take on this is that there isn’t a “gap” between iTunes et al and DVD/Blue-Ray; rather, iTunes et al and DVD/Blue-Ray are actually serving seperate needs. VHS v.s. DVD, a Historical Perspective Admittedly, this isn’t a direct analogy, but I think that it helps to illustrate my point. Odd as it may sound now, when DVD was first introduced there were pundits who claimed that it would fail to topple VHS as a force in the market. One of the reasons provided was that VHS was a read/write media; and people would Just a quick translation from CEO-speak to English of the recent comments from the CEO’s of Mozilla and eMusic (I’m not linking, google them yourselves).
…Apple is a bad “Windows citizen” because they “sneakily” “forced” Safari 3.1 on unsuspecting Windows iTunes users. Apparently some of the whiny twats in the blogokleinbottle are up in arms that Apple offered up Safari 3.1 for Windows in the Software Update tool that gets installed with iTunes/QuickTime on Windows. My take: here’s a douche to wash the sand out of your achy achy vaginas. First of all, while I admit that it was odd of Apple to offer up the Safari update to people who hadn’t previously installed it, they hardly “forced” it onto anyone. Software Update allows one to skip updates. And the argument that “anyone who just selects the defaults will be “forced” into installing Safari merely reinforces the time honored perception that Windows users are, in fact, mouth breathing morons. Second, bitching that anyone is a “bad” Windows citizen is the rhetorical equivalent of arguing that one turd in a sea of shit is particularly stinky. Microsoft is a bad Windows citizen. And I’ll tell you, having Safari magically appear on my computer pales in comparison to the times I’ve come back from lunch to find that all my work has been killed by a Windows update Ashutosh Chaturvedi! Ashu serves up one hell of a two-fer on his blog. In fact, his blog has a whopping 2 posts, and they’re both mind bogglingly retarded. Taking the lesser of two fuck-ups first, we have this gem. Ashu is upset that Tuesday’s Leopard Security update broke ssh. Quote:
He even manages to link to the whiny entitle-twats on the Apple discussion forums bitching about it. Only problem is, it’s not an Apple error. In fact, it’s Rogue Amoeba’s fuckup, as evidenced in the very fucking thread he links too. Now, true, the actual cause wasn’t determined until after Ashu posted his little droppings; but then again, when did a MacMac blogger ever take the fucking time to troubleshoot an error before unleasing the floodgates of whining on Apple.But really, that is just the warm up for the real, aneurysm inducing what-the-fuck that Ashu managed to spill forth yesterday. See, apparently Ashu was actually let into the iPhone Developer program. That’s right, Hahahha, fuck me this is a good one. Via Crooks and Liars: CNN Admits It Should Have Vetted Guest Expert Better. Apparently the “guest expert” discussing the Spitzer situation was a former U.S. Attorney who lost his job after, “being accused of biting a topless dancer on the arm during a visit to an adult club after losing a big drug case.” No, CNN; I’m fairly certain that you picked the absolute best possible guest expert. Strap in cats and catettes, this is going to be a bumpy ride. Apparently Apple has made their first round picks for the iPhone developer program. Note, this only applies to developers receiving the certificates that they need to install and test their software on physical iPhones. Anyone reading more into the decisions (such as who will eventually be let into the iPhone AppStore) is full of more bullshit than a constipated Angus. Against all odds, and seriously here I’m fucking shocked, the first story on this to hit my feed-reader was from iLounge with this gob-smackingly non-hyperbolic story. I mean, what the deuce iLounge; what sort of chumps are you, posting the actual email contents and not wildly speculating? Are you trying to put me out of the bitch-slapping business? For contrast, here is the headline from TUAW “iPhone developer rejection letter mass mailing“ Rejection you say! Well fuck Apple, I can’t believe that they would be so cruel. El jeffe must be cackling with joy at the thought of all those disappointed developers. Or, wait, let’s see that the actual fucking “rejection” letter (which iLounge was good Today Apple held an event to layout the roadmap for enterprise support and the SDK. I’ll leave the analysis of the event to my betters, mainly because a) I don’t own an iPhone, b) I’m not a developer and c) the morons in charge of “Enterprise IT” where I’m at would first ask if that was a ship captained by a chap named Kirk, then ask if you could help them with the hand they have stuck in a honey jar. Instead I’m going to focus on Ryan Block of Engadget, because he is a fucking tool. Let’s just lay this one out here, since I’m sure the rest of the blogotesseract will be all over this soon enough. Ryan was actually dimwitted enough to ask, during the Q&A following the announcement, if a SIM unlocking application would be something that Apple would allow. Yeah, just let that one sink in a bit. Ryan, we get it, I’ve listened to your crappy podcast. You’re none to fond of Apple. You don’t like iPods. And you’re firmly in the category of fucktards that think that, just because you think that a feature is neato-keen, well then by-cracky the manufacturer just better fucking add |
 
 
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